My most recent patient told me that he had never done any drugs, except for a little mj in his younger years. I asked several times. The next day, we told him we had found cocaine in his urine toxicity screen which completely explained his illness. He was actually quite funny about it.

After the resident left, he told me, "Sorry for lying to you."

The next morning I see him, and I tell him his creatinine kinase went up again. I must have had a funny look on my face, cuz he exclaimed, "I didn't sneak any, I swear! You can look through all my stuff!" And again... "Sorry I lied to you."

When I told him we'd probably have to keep him in the hospital over the weekend, and that I wouldn't see him tomorrow because I get my one day a week off he said, "Well, I hope it rains on your day off."

I told him I would be indoors studying, so it wouldn't matter if it rained or not.

He said "Then I hope the power goes out."